hot_tramp: ten commandments kink (religion-kink)
posted by [personal profile] hot_tramp at 07:28pm on 02/04/2013 under ,
I've been dating this motherfucker for how many years, and now he tells me he wants to spank me, tie me up, gag me, etc.?

Apparently I opened the floodgates when I made my kink request a few weeks ago. I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but what the fuck, he's just been sitting on this?!
Mood:: lusty
Music:: "Love into the Light," Ke$ha
hot_tramp: ten commandments kink (religion-kink)
posted by [personal profile] hot_tramp at 08:02am on 29/03/2013 under
Is it me, or is this just as obnoxious as unsolicited dick pics and copy-pasted porn?

"I have an odd request for you. I'm in a D/s relationship and my Daddy has given me an assignment. I have to get five women to look at a picture of me in the lingerie Daddy bought me. I also have to get punishment suggestions from you. This is a public humiliation assignment, so it's really hard for me to do this. I hope you reply."

This was on OKCupid, mind you, not FetLife. I'm tempted to reply with some helpful hints about, I dunno, not using random strangers in your humiliation play, but I also kind of feel like I'm being a prig. What say you, interweb?
Mood:: annoyed
Music:: "My Love is Like -- Wo," Mya
hot_tramp: ten commandments kink (religion-kink)
posted by [personal profile] hot_tramp at 06:37pm on 03/03/2013 under ,
Both of my boyfriends are vanilla, and while they know I'm kinky, we generally don't discuss specifics. I think they know the broad strokes thanks to a) stuff I own, b) things I've written on LJ in the past, and c) offhand comments I've made. But I feel weird talking about it with them in any detail because they are, like, the anti-fetishists. You know how dudes are always asking how to get their ladies to be wild in bed, and they'll say "Honey, tell me your fantasies," and supposedly the ladies reply "I don't really have any"? That's them. They like sex because it feels nice and because it's loving and intimate. Rose petals and eye contact and shit. And I'm over here going "Right, but could you maybe objectify me a little?"

This was a non-issue for several years because my sex drive was nil thanks to depression and then Zoloft. If I could muster up enough libido to fuck, I wasn't interested in bells and whistles. For about the last year, though, I've consistently been interested in sex. And then I spent three months dating a guy I was ridiculously sexually compatible with -- bi, kinky, switchy, horny, talented, etc. That ended, I was completely emotionally ruined for a while, and I've only just opened up shop again, so to speak. And I'm discovering that 100% vanilla is not really cutting it anymore.

I spent the weekend with my medium-distance boyfriend, whom I see pretty much every other weekend since he lives about 100 miles away. We went to karaoke. I got tipsy. We were being very smoochy and gropey and flirty in our booth. After hemming and hawing for a while, I worked up the courage to tell him something I wanted him to do in bed. For all the game I talk about communication, this was actually quite scary for me. I was afraid he would laugh uncomfortably and pretend I never said anything, or go along with it even if it seemed weird and didn't feel right. It's pretty fucking tame, but I'm good at psyching myself out. It took two tall drinks for me to chill out enough to actually say "You know how I like it when you pull my hair? I also like a hand on my throat. Like, a lot."

And then we went home and had sex, and he totally choked me a little, and it was awesome. \o/

Trying to negotiate kink with vanilla men is interesting. I don't know if other switchy women have had this experience, but it seems like it's much easier to get a straight vanilla guy to do some light topping/domming than to do any kind of bottoming/subbing. Blah blah blah patriarchy. Fortunately I'm about 75% bottom/sub, so this works out acceptably. As much as I would love to tie them up and peg the hell out of them, I can live with this. (To their credit, they are both at least consistent -- they have no desire to give or receive any butt stuff.)
Mood:: accomplished
Music:: "Fear and Loathing," Marina and the Diamonds
hot_tramp: ten commandments kink (religion-kink)
posted by [personal profile] hot_tramp at 09:09am on 09/02/2013 under , , , ,
Right now, there's a throwdown on FetLife (a popular kinky social network) over content restrictions. It reminds me a bit of the old LJ battles -- except it looks like FL is going to end up with rules that are more restrictive than LJ's. Or at least, LJ's post-strikethrough rules. If they've tightened up over the last couple years, I wouldn't have noticed.

The credit card processing companies have been putting the squeeze on sex-related websites, telling them they will no longer do business with them unless they crack down on certain types of content. When this content is discussions about grooming children for sexual abuse, this crackdown is awesome. FL was taking a very lax position on such content, allowing communities about trufax non-fantasy molestation to continue. So, you know, fuck that, and yay for someone getting FL to shut that shit down.

The credit card companies are also insisting that FL disallow other "obscene" content. Remember that "obscene," in the U.S., means more than "pornographic." They are specifically calling out scat, bestiality, and incest (even among adults). And they're apparently asking that fictional content about these topics be forbidden, too.

This worries me. The AO3 doesn't have any such content restrictions. Does that mean the OTW is in danger of getting squeezed like this? I just wrote a moderately graphic teen sibling incest fic for Yuletide. (Based, mind you, on canon teen sibling incest from a 17th century play.) Is the OTW eventually going to be pressured to delete fics like that or lose the ability to take money from people through anything but BitCoin?
Mood:: worried
location: "Another Girl's Paradise," Tori Amos

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