yallya ([personal profile] yallya) wrote in [personal profile] hot_tramp 2013-04-16 05:44 am (UTC)

Why do you believe that cohabitating boyfriend would put himself, and all of you, in that pickle?

Do you think he has not considered the possibility that non-cohabitating boyfriend will have some sort of non-autoclaved sex with this woman?

The two bf's are besties, right? Have they really not talked about this stuff, about how no-co-bf's choices will affect co-bf and, by extension, you?

Does co-bf have difficulty predicting or accessing his feelings and wants? Do the three of you have some strong philosophy that one person's choices should never take into account predictable effects on others?

I am trying to understand how or why there is a problem. It seems like the two guys especially, and maybe all 3 of you, would just talk prior to the date and hash out what affects whom and how to proceed to optimise comfort and happiness for all concerned. Isn't that, like, basic poly?


I worry that I am sounding judgemental :). I ma not feeling judgemental, just like, 'What have you done with the HT I know from P&K?' Speaking of replicants :).

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